Magainze cover

I'm overwhelmed that I have this opportunity to be on a magazine cover. I'm not able to say which one yet as there are things still be negotiated. Thank you Kenneth Mgt.

I never expected to wake up yesterday morning with this news. I've yet to be here a year and so much has happened. When I first arrived I thought for sure I'd fail (based on past experiences), yet I was determined to not fail. I've worked on changing my outlook and have learned to be more positive and expect to do well.

Self Reflection:
Is it worth it to worry over things that will be forgotten in a few days?

My manager

No, I'm not going to complain about my manager. I'm going to give him a huge thank you! Kenneth Mgt., thank you for all that you're doing for my career and thank you for believing in me. I also think that your ideas are phenomenal and I appreciate that you welcome my creative input as well.

Too Busy for My Own Good

Be careful what you pray for - it may come to pass.

Going from desperation to too much has always seemed to be a problem for many in this world and I'm included. Just when I thought all was lost some miraculous things have happened to propel me and my family forward in this journey of life.

The morning brought great news for me, although working yesterday was tough on me, I always find that there's a silver lining on the other side of the dark, ominous cloud. I was picked for a small part in a film. I auditioned for it and had forgotten about it. I always try to audition and then leave it alone, it's no longer in my hands.

I feel extremely blessed and am grateful.

Self Reflection
In times of trouble are we...
...like reeds in the wind that sway to and fro in double mindedness or are we like strong solid oak trees that stand firm and never sway to the left or the right but keep firmly grounded with our roots dug in tight? (I need to work on this one)

The Rose

With many tears tonight, I pondered...

Just remember in the winter,
far beneath the bitter snow.

Lies the seed that with the sun's love,
in the spring, becomes the rose.

A very special woman told me that I was like a rose bud that would be opened one petal at a time. Each petal will have a portion of my life written on it. These petals will be used to help encourage people through their suffering and be a beacon of beauty and hope for them.

It sounds beautiful and it enthralls my heart with joy when I'm cloaked in sorrow; like I am now. I carry so many burdens.

I'm still waiting for my petals to bloom into a fragrant blossom.

COLD CASE - shoot

Just when I thought that things weren't going to look up - something extraordinary happened. I got a call for a show: Cold Case. This was such a blast and I met so many great people. The crew was so hospitable and the cast was so friendly to work with.

So what did I do?

There a lot of humor to this story (I think so) and it shows that perseverance pays off.

I haven't been on the Warner lot in....let's just say that leg warmers were still "in" and I was a wee one. But I think they're in now-big this winter. Too funny. I managed to get lost and ended up on French Street when I needed to be on st. 27. At least I wasn't late. I always leave room for my uncanny ability to get inevitably lost. (Helpful hint: knowing one's weeknesses is just as important as knowing one's strengths.)

After I found where st. 27 was, I got my wardrobe (this is so much better than working in Vegas doing the same thing--I always had to provide my own wardrobe). I had such a cool wardrobe lady. She picked out this hot pink evening dress for me to try on and it was "hot". Since the breast cancer my weight is a bit under so I didn't fill this dress out as much as I normally would have, but the gathers hid my lack well. :o)

Then, she asked if I could do her a favor and I said, "Of course", she handed me what looked like the skin from a pink muppet: think Cookie Monster's sister. It was a middriff style jacket with fuschia fur. (I don't remember this style of the 1970s too much I was still watching Sesame St-lol) This was great fun to wear and boy was it hot under the stage lights. I worked out a plan and slipped it off when we weren't rolling and the crew got some water for me.

I was nicknamed Elmo and was asked if I could be tickled, I didn't mind this at all. This was a blast and everyone was super fun to work with. A 12 hour day is hard to get through and there's nothing worse than getting through it with grouchy people. I'm so thrilled to say this wasn't the case at all. I've been on the other side, the crew side many times and I can't begin to tell you how much harder the day is when there's a bad attitude on the set. My hats are off to the director and AD for running a great ship!

To all that I met yesterday, thank you so much for welcoming me. Some knew this, but some didn't: this was my first time back to work since my cancer and everyone made me feel comfortable. Thank You!

As I've said before, my life doesn't make too much sense. Maybe some can figure it out better than I. All I know is that a lot is expected of me and I have to live the life I was born to live-we all should. How I get from one point to the next remains to be quite baffling as it does seem strange to me. And to answer the question again (in talking with many yesterday I was asked): "How does someone with 3 Emmy noms. on the production side end up not being able to work in the industry for a long time, then working as an actress? Then to start from the ground up acting knowing all that I've accomplished in the past on the other side of the camera?

I don't have a good answer. I'm still asking it myself. All I can say is what I did and what happened.

It doesn't make sense for me to always know that I wanted to be an actress since I was 4 and dabble with it on and off for my entire life but then hide behind my writing, producing, directing and be very successful at those things but not seriously taking in hand that I was supposed to be an actress. I mean, haven't I proven that I have talent and drive to be able to be successful in the industry with my past success? Why not apply it to acting?

I'll say this much: the breast cancer was my wake up call. If not for this disease I would've gone to my grave (whether sooner or hopefully later) knowing that I was too chicken to go for the acting career--my passion! My Nana always said don't find yourself on your death bed regretting that you: could've, shoul've, then ultimately didn't.

I hope this answers why I'm starting from the very beginning with my acting again and have made the writing and other stuff secondary. Success doesn't fill the soul unless it's success in an area that we love. I'm completely committed now to wield the craft of acting. I guess in short: In the past I was filling my soul with things that danced around acting (from script supervisor to producer) and was fooling myself into thinking that I was doing what I wanted.

My other posts below and in the archives deals with this issue of mine a lot. I'm still searching to make sense of it all, it's been a fantastic journey. If I were to write it in novel form it would capture it well, but it would be the most unfilmable book. It has no structure but it does have a lot of breadcrumbs and clues.

I need to stop pondering all of this and just enjoy the ride. I may miss it if I become too analytical.

Self Reflection
Are we too busy, too self focused, too filled with regret or sorrow to enjoy the ride?
Unabashedly, I can say for myself: yes. I am changing this about myself.

Please, I say this often: Go live your dreams!
My love and admiration to all dreamers, Noelle

Amoureux - album release

Almost forgot. Our first full length album: "Return to Love" (this one has vocals too) looks to keep its release date on 2.10.07. Technically, you probably could call this one the second one.

Meeting Garry Marshall

I wanted to get away from all the heaviness my blog has been containing lately and share this delightful and lighthearted story about meeting Garry Marshall. You may remember him as director of Pretty Woman, Laverne & Shirley, Happy Days, etc. I'd been dying to meet Mr. G. since, gosh, I was a kid and hooked on his shows. As you can tell from my other posts, I was a TV/movie junkie. Hey, how better to understand what works--watching the masters of the craft is how.

First I need to say that he's just a sweet heart. Here's my tale....

We bought tickets and saw an incredible performance. After the play everyone met in the lobby. There were so many news reviewers and such, at the time I didn't recognize any of them, but now having been exposed to this crowd I learned that they were really important and could make or break this production.

Anyhow, I saw out of the corner of my eye a gray haired gentleman. I asked my hubby, is that Mr. G? Sure enough it was. We introduced ourselves and he was so thrilled to see a young boy, our son at the play. We spoke, but only for a brief moment, but you can tell this man is integral.

It turned out that we were able to submit our script: "Billion Dollar Bride" to him to read. We didn't have a writing agent at the time so we went it alone through our production company. He's not able to do it, but hey, who knows what can happen?

It's just too funny because 2 years ago when we wrote the script we had Mr. G. in mind to direct. We were still in Vegas at the time and didn't know how we'd get this script to him. One of his past co-producers from Pretty Woman told us we wouldn't get within 10 yards of Mr. G.--really? This was totally coincidental, or was it?

I don't know, but the way things have been orchestrated in our lives, nothing seems coincidental to me anymore. There is a master plan here, and I just know we're on the brink of something really great. Call it kismet or faith or something. But all the extreme bad that has happened to us from my breast cancer (and a lot of other extreme crap) has to at some point be balanced out by extreme good. Maybe we got all the crappy stuff out of the way?? Let's hope.

While our success (we've had some success with our Emmy noms for our doc., but I'm talkin' about SUCCESS being able to get all our projects funded) has always been only slightly out of our grasp, just missing by a frustrating uuuuggghh--this succession of near misses is a sign of what's yet to come, good things.

Anyway, we adore you Mr. G. and I still want to be under your wing as an actress someday. Wait for me.